Silly Emplosions

This is a new idea of a program language. It is just a idea so it isn't really invented yet. This is a list of the ideas:

If you leave a variable for too long without assigning a value, the variable will lose its value.
You can return from a function more than once to return multiple values from the function at the same time.
Sometimes it skips commands and doesn't do it right the first time so you have to repeat it sometimes.
If you try to read a value of a variable that isn't set yet, it will continue until a value is assigned, then it will go back and try again what it was trying to do before.
A return statement will not always know where to return to.
You can write a program by dragging a stylus across the screen, and if you don't like it, you can try again.
The source-code needs to have a .EXE extension to confuse people.
You have to use floating-point calculations for dealing with strings.
Large arrays are stored on VHS tapes.
The program has to compile itself after it has been compiled with the compiler.
The program source-code includes control characters like BEL and stuff as parts of variable names.
Every variable should be immediately deallocated once the data stored in said variable has been read once.
] closes an (, } closes [ and ) closes {. Strings start with ' and end with ", or they can start with " and end with ' for the interpreter to automatically convert them to leet.
Any "if" statement requires at least 14,000 subconditions.